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Showing posts with label naked november. Show all posts
Showing posts with label naked november. Show all posts

Getting Over Shame Through Nude Photography (NSFW)



It's already nearly mid-way through Naked November, so we've been thinking about nudity a lot. We support getting naked in all forms, including photography. What better way to show off your beauty than getting photographed? An intimate photographer, the artist behind 101 Vagina, is here to talk about how nude photography could decrease your shame of getting naked. Why? Read on!

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I do a fair bit of nude photography, but almost exclusively of women, so how does this relate to couples? Well, let me tell you a story.

A friend of mine, Eva, was complimenting some of my photos in a series of clay covered nudes and since I mostly shoot friends, I remarked that it could be her in those photos. She chuckled, declined and said she had a lot of body image issues. Stunning as she is I was not surprised since this is unfortunately all too common.

To combat one particular body image issue and taboo I have also been working on a coffee table photo book called 101 Vagina, a collection of 101 photos with a message from each of the women. When this arose in conversation I again asked if she might be interested in participating. Again she declined.

But her compliments kept coming and I suggested she might appreciate seeing herself through fresh eyes. In the end it was her boyfriend who emboldened her, saying it might help her get over some of her negative body image. So she got in touch to participate, in both projects no less.

Most people are a little awkward in front of a camera at first, but Eva was almost inconsolable. She was visibly struggling, so I went to give her a hug. I was stunned. Her whole body was shaking, from the inside, as if some massive tectonic plates were shifting in her character, dislodging old and strong patterns of shame. I had never witnessed anyone confront such massive fear, and have the courage to go ahead in spite of it. Massive kudos to her!

As it turned out it didn't take long for her to relax into the shoot and we got some great images. She could hardly believe that the images were of her, seeing herself through my eyes allowed her to see the beauty in my beholder's eye, rather than the critic in hers.

The next day Eva wrote to me me that she looked at herself in the mirror naked for the first time ever!

More recently she shared this about how it affected her relationship. "It certainly has changed our relationship, firstly I was so amazed and felt so loved when he told me to go ahead with something that I thought most guys would discourage. When I sent him the pics I was really nervous, and I was so happy to hear that he loved them. I'm much less shy around him now, and find it slightly easier to talk to him about my body."

Witnessing such shifts is the reward for the conscious nude photographer. But it was not always so.

My journey with nude photography began many years before I ever took a nude photograph; in my mind. I dreamed of doing it ever since I became sexually aware but there was a huge barrier in the way. That barrier was shame. My mother was a fairly strong feminist and the message I inadvertently internalised was that male sexual desire is the root cause of all evil in the world, that nudes are degrading and people who take them akin to murderers. And yet I loved the images.

Perhaps fittingly it was a woman who finally invited me into the world of nude photography, and that first experience, and all that followed, have worked to reverse my inhibitions. It was a healing process for me, an affirmation that my appreciation of the female form is not only tolerated, but appreciated. Further to that, it was often a healing experience for the women also.

Any shame we hold around our bodies and sexuality will always impact on the way we share ourselves with others. Shame is a powerful hindrance to happiness and it does not dislodge easily. If it's easy to talk about it's not shame you're dealing with. Shame is the last thing we want to talk about, ever. But it's the first step to really being honest and connecting with ourselves and others.

Philip Werner is a Melbourne (Australia) based photographer (philipwernerfoto.com), web-designer, meditator, furniture maker (lazydeckchairs.com.au), thinker, engineer, shit-stirrer and perhaps soon-to-be book publisher (101vagina.com).

He has travelled the external and internal world extensively and gotten a closer understanding of each in the process. His photographic portrait work demonstrates this awareness through the depth of presence he captures in his subjects, bringing their internal world to light in the external form of their bodies. Follow him on Twitter & Facebook.

7 Reasons You Should Sleep Naked

Naked November is finally here! Unless you are a nudist, you spend most of your time clothed. We are so used to being bundled up that we have no clue what we look like au naturale. Naked November at GetLusty.com is all about shedding your layers, physically and emotionally, and getting naked! If you are new to this whole naked thing, there is some good news! You have about 8 hours in a day where you can be naked in a safe and comfortable environment. Sleeping naked is freeing and we recommend it! So strip down and hop into bed. GetLusty's Lora Swarts is here with 7 reasons to start sleeping in the buff!

Note: If you live in Minnesota don't sleep naked because it's against the law!

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#1 It's comfortable

Clothes are never really comfortable when you snooze. Underwear, boxers, and t-shirts all bunch up! Stop tossing and turning and opt for a more relaxed and cozy night time outfit: your own skin. Sleeping naked may not cure insomnia, but it will give you a more comfortable night's sleep.

#2 Beat the heat 

Sure, it's November. And if you are anywhere like Chicago, it's getting chilly outside. But with the heat blasting, sleeping under all those blankets can get hot. Going nude, even in the winter months, will keep you from sweating!

#3 Go green 

The less you wear, the less you wash. Save Mother Nature and a few loads of laundry by going naked. You won't need to wash your pajamas and other nightly negligees every week, which saves you time and money while helping the environment.

#4 Sex, sex, sex

Great sex comes from having confidence. When you are worried about your body, chances are your sex won't be that great. For better sex, sleep naked! Get comfortable in your own skin! If you are married or live with your partner, invite them to go nude too. Sleeping naked doesn't have to always lead to sex; it's such a wonderful and sensual moment to just hold each other nude. However, there are pros to sleeping naked together — when you don't have to unbutton shirts or deal with bra hooks, sex is that much easier and more frequent.

#5 It's healthy

It is liberating to come home and undress from those restrictive clothes you wore for hours at a time. So stay naked once you undress for bed. Being naked gives your pores access to more oxygen that it then uses to pump clean healthy blood to your brain, heart and vital organs. So get naked and let every surface of your body breathe while you sleep.

#6 More Confidence 

It is scary to be naked when we aren't comfortable in our own skin. Being that raw and vulnerable is difficult for anyone! Going naked exposes all the parts we tend to hide or improve with clothing. As you see and feel your naked body you begin to embrace every curve, freckle, scar and any other imperfections you think you have. So remove your clothes and start loving yourself. Your confidence will soar and negative thoughts will dissolve.

#7 It's Fun! 

Being naked is so freeing! Have you ever heard of Chicago's annual World Naked Bike Ride? Naked individuals ride their bicycles at night as a way of celebrating the human body and freedom from oil. No, you don't have to go streaking to have fun, but once you start sleeping naked, you may start cooking naked, cleaning naked and just being naked more in general! The more living you do naked, the happier you will be with you body too.

Lora is our Editorial intern and resident health nut. When she is not writing, you can find her on her yoga mat, exploring Chicago via bicycle or spending time with her wonderful boyfriend and Beagle puppy in their north side apartment. She has a habit of spending too much money on soy lattes and yoga clothes. Find her on Twitter @HoneyNutLo. Have any questions? Email her at Lora@getlusty.com

Moms! 10 Ideas For Feeling Your Sexiest




We've heard from several moms they don't want to participate in Naked November. Their belly, their body — sometimes moms feel they're not be the same after bearing children, or feel they have to dress more conservatively because they are a mom. From one mom to another, GetLusty's mom advocate, Eileen Prouffe, is here to say that kids don't mean you can't express yourself: be who you are and embrace your curves! Eileen is here to give her tips to inspire the very important ladies out there — moms!

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#1 Sleepwear

Don't feel you have to sleep in cotton nightgowns every night and hide your body. While they may be comfortable, they are not always sexy. Sleep in just a sexy t-shirt, lingerie, or better yet, naked. Just don't forget to lock the bedroom door.

#2 Get your hair done

My husband loves when I come home from the salon with a new hair style. It will make you feel rejuvenated and like a brand new person inside and out. Getting even the dead ends cut off of your hair can make a huge difference and give you an extra boost of confidence. If you're more of the daring type then try a new hair color and style all together. Have fun with yourself; life is short!

#3 Dress up

If you find yourself always in pajama pants or mom jeans, then it's time to change things up a bit and put on a dress, skirt, or at least some heels with those jeans. Sometimes just dressing up makes you feel good, even if you have nowhere to go. Your significant other will be surprised when they get home and it may help them get in the mood for a little love making. That's what we want, right?

#4 Pamper yourself

Sometimes moms just don't take enough time out to relax and take care of themselves.  Take a hot bath or shower and relax with some scented oils, candles, and an alcoholic beverage of your choice.  Even just exfoliating your whole body with a loofah sponge or body scrub will make you feel great.  Don't forget to moisturize afterwards to leave your skin silky smooth.  I like Avon's Skin So Soft because I can add it to the bath or apply after a shower. Clean up your eyebrows, apply a mask, or even a deep conditioning treatment.  There are endless things you can do for yourself.  Recently, my aunt gave me the tip of warming up a little olive oil and soaking my nails and dry cuticles in it.  Instant manicure!

#5 Get made up

Cosmetic companies are always coming out with new and exciting products that can perk up your face. If your make-up hasn't been updated in a while with more advanced products and different colors, maybe it's time to take a trip to Sephora. Old make-up can be bad for our skin and mascara can get bacteria in it, so it's wise to get new stuff every once in a while. Plus, it's fun and can make you feel like a sex goddess.

#6 Laugh and smile!

It's easy to get caught up in the daily routine of life and forget to take time out to laugh and smile. Not only does it feel good to laugh and smile, but it can help relive tension and stress which means you'll be more relaxed for a good time with your partner later. Your partner will enjoy seeing your smiling face too. If no one is around, then you can put on a funny show or a comedy movie to help life your spirits.

#7 Be a Boudair Pinup

Boudair photography. There are many tasteful-yet-sexy photographers that can take some amazing pictures of you. Have you seen the list of GetLusty recommended Chicago-based boudair photographers? Don't stop there, you could have the photos done in a studio, a park, or even your own home. No money for a photographer? Let your hubby take one! Posing for a picture can be playful, sexy, fun and confidence building because all the attention is on you. It's your moment and you can own it. Your lover will likely enjoy them too. Be a model for the day.

#8 Have a non-mom zone

Yes, you're a mom and I'm a mom, but we're still our own person too. We need our own space free of coupons, school papers and bills.  Whether it's your bedroom, office, or kitchen table, you need your own personal space where you can get creative and gather your thoughts. Even if it's just a cute reading chair, it will work as long as everyone in your household respects your space. It doesn't feel sexy to be bombarded with everyone else's life 24/7.  Remember that you have your own goals and dreams to look after as well.

#9 Walk or jog

There's nothing like walking or jogging down the block and seeing heads turn as you go by. Not only will going for a walk or jog feel good and help you lose or maintain weight, but it can help you realize that you are still beautiful to look at. We may not always see it, but others do. Even if you don't want to exercise, you can just get out of the house and be around others. I was at the grocery store one time and a younger man who worked at the store hit on me while I was shopping.  It was very innocent, but flattering to know I still had it.

#10 Dance the night away

No matter how you dance or what type of music you like, there's nothing sexier than a woman dancing and having a good time. You'll feel great, have a good time, and it might even turn your partner on. Whether you decide to go out to a night club or stay home and dance in the bedroom, you'll feel hotter then ever. Dancing is good for the soul. You can always turn your dance into a strip tease too!

Eileen Prouffe is a new GetLusty writer, but has over ten years as a working mom and trying to keep her love alive. If she's not having fun with her three kids, she's staring into the eyes of her loving husband. She looks forward to sharing her ideas, tips and knowledge with everyone to help improve relationships and put an end to dull sex lives. Get in touch with Eileen at eileen@getlusty.com.

Podcast! Bonnie Gayle on Feeling Beautiful Naked


Chief Body Liberator and co-creator of Sex Butter, Bonnie Gayle is no stranger to self-esteem and body issues. After years of dealing with these problems first-hand, Bonnie found many women hate their bodies and portray them in a negative light.

Today, she uses her experiences to teach others that not only does learning to love yourself improve your confidence, but it improves your intimate relationships. We sat down with Bonnie to chat about how changing your body image isn't just about changing yourself physically, but mentally as well, and we've recorded it for your listening pleasure.

What we talked about:
  • How does having a negative body image affect your intimate relationships? If you don't feel comfortable being naked by yourself, you probably will not feel comfortable being naked with a partner, Bonnie says.
  • What does Bonnie suggest to help overcome body image issues? Start infusing positive messages into your daily routine with Post-It notes around the house to remind you that you are beautiful!
  • Look at one part of your body in the mirror and say, "I love you and I accept you," Bonnie recommends to give yourself an extra dose of self-love throughout the day.
  • Use Sex Butter by rubbing it on specific body parts and tell yourself positive things about that body part; this makes it easier to start accepting yourself for who you are today, and positive change will follow.
  • How does positive body image affect your sexuality? When you feel confident and comfortable in your body you can connect better with your partner physically and emotionally; no matter what body part you think needs improvement, your partner loves you for who you are!
More about Bonnie:

Bonnie Gayle, Body Liberator, is a “body whisperer and sexual empowerment coach for women”.   Bonnie speaks publicly and facilitates the teaching of overcoming body image and self esteem issues to women so they can fully embrace sexual pleasure.  After co-creating Sex Butter, Yes Butter, and The Butter, products made from organic plant based oils which have been enhancing and healing women and couples, her true mission came alive: “Body Liberation”!

Bonnie’s know-how on sensitive subjects like negative body image, self loathing, and painful sexual issues stems from her own personal journey - a past filled with traumatic sexual experiences that led to an eating disorder and hating everything about herself.  Bonnie coped in all sorts of unhealthy ways, including withdrawal, binging & purging, emotional eating, promiscuity and self-deprecation.  After overcoming her eating disorder and negative body image & self worth issues and empowering herself, Bonnie has successfully assisted, mentored, and taught thousands of women the importance of loving the body you are in, treating it kindly, and stepping into embracing true sexual pleasure.

Bonnie is a member of several prominent women’s groups including: Women’s Speakers Assn., Top Female Executives, Cambridge Who’s Who, & NAPW and Over 40 Females. Read more about Bonnie at BodyLiberator.com, or connect with her through Facebook and Twitter @SexButterBabe.

32 Affirmations From a Nudist (Why Be Nude--Now!)


It's Naked November, so we're all about getting down to our skivvies. We even have several fun nude date ideas. But why? What's so particularly great about being nude? And why in November? OK, we admit it's a bit too chilly for nudity. But that doesn't mean you can't look at yourself naked and feel good. Being naked is about having a positive body image, accepting yourself, and others as well--including all of their flaws. Our resident friend and nudist, Roy Michael Blakely, is here to explain his 32 affirmations for why you should be naked right now.

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Why I Love To Be Nude

For happiness! Naturism keeps, provides, allows, reveals, answers, fulfills, completes and confirms our return to a spiritual design of being human for the joy of loving and being loved beyond all secrecy, inhibition, doubt, and betrayal.

#1 Being Nude keeps me grounded, and protects me from the incremental assassination by a world seeking to rule my awareness with bigotry, sexism, and lust.

#2 Being Nude keeps me more alert - attuned to my surroundings and those around me in a stress-free state of mind.

#3 Being Nude keeps me vigilant in my faith for self-worth and values.

#4 Being Nude keeps me - ME. I belong to ME without self-doubt or pity, thus remaining free as ME to inspire the happiness & joy that gives you me, and me you, free of debt as my reward for being ME.

#5 Being Nude provides my perpetual invitation for new friendships seeking to honor this awareness with our mutual sharing and living.

#6 Being Nude provides the comfort essential for my spirituality.

#7 Being Nude provides the clarity of self-worth and honoring self-esteem with unbridled reflection.

#8 Being Nude provides freedom for others that welcomes their uninhibited selves, for the honor of sharing and living without pretenses.

#9 Being Nude allows me to uphold the honorable spiritual truth that the penis and vagina constitute the physical host for Gender Values, and that no shame, guilt, or fear should diminish our Sum by my attitude and actions.

#10 Being Nude allows me to feel closer to my Higher Power. Bearing no pretense for the design of me--as a spiritual being embodying the human experience.

#11 Being Nude allows me to be more easily recognized by those who embody my passions and honor.

#12 Being Nude allows me to better illuminate the women who can embrace my awareness of them, from the many in denial of that spiritual worth.

#13 Being Nude for a woman‘s honorable worth, reveals my faith in her as undiminished given a lack of pretense by her.

#14 Being Nude for a woman's reflection of her own self worth, reveals her self-esteem with me as undiminished without pretense by me.

#15 Being Nude for a woman‘s acceptance of me, reveals an affection from her that welcomes my worth without excuse.

#16 Being Nude for a woman‘s need of embracing who I am, reveals the affection I seek to share in the mutual worth of friendship, romance, and sexuality.

#17 Being Nude answers the best of what we are in spirit, to honor the most of who we are in the flesh. We can embrace our truth in one another - family, friendship, marriage, and faith, without the ignorance or arrogance of secrecy, inhibition, doubt, or betrayal diminishing that acceptance.

#18 Being Nude answers my greatest honor in being alive as a human being, for the faith and self- worth that constitutes the love with which I worship my Higher Power, in total acceptance.

#19 Being Nude answers the devotion I seek to share with others in family, friendship, marriage, and faith, in total acceptance.

#20 Being Nude answers the need for spiritually, emotionality, and sexuality.

#21 Being Nude fulfills my need for being me, as my quest to worship my Higher Power finds peace and joy in what I am by spiritual design.

#22 Being Nude fulfills my courage of being me, as my need for being nude is of my faith and not by doubt.

#23 Being Nude fulfills my purpose in being me, as shame, guilt, and fear bear no religion as my faith to seduce me.

#24 Being Nude fulfills my duty of being me against all the social assassinations of my spirit sought by religion and politics.

#25 Being Nude completes me with the face value of my self worth, by the naked truth of faith through gentle eyes. With nothing left to shed as a nudist who worships a Higher Power, as a celebration of our sum, answers with reflections of You by spiritual design, that hate cannot undress as a pretense.

#26 Being Nude completes my trust with others about Gender Values, by the gentle eyes I inherit as a nudist to embrace whom I can as a sum rather than for their parts. Greed cannot claim me with selfish want.

#27 Being Nude completes me upon the orgasm, by the gentle eyes I inherit as a nudist to honor sex with the dignity of my own esteem. Temptation cannot answer for me.

#28 Being Nude completes me upon my free agency, by the gentle eyes I inherit as a nudist to respect others as I respect myself, that clothing cannot determine for me.

#29 Being Nude confirms my dignity by my Higher Power's domain, as my spiritual will by realization over consensus, seeks to discover and not plagiarize my meaning with others by spiritual grace.

#30 Being Nude confirms my beauty by my Higher Power‘s domain, as my spiritual will by realization over consensus, seeks to extend, rather than patronize the worth of others by spiritual blessing.

#31 Being Nude confirms my love by My Higher Power‘s domain, as my spiritual will by realization over consensus, seeks to embrace, rather than question, the spiritual truth of others by spiritual will.

#32 Being Nude confirms my sexuality by my Higher Power‘s domain, as my spiritual will by realization over consensus, seeks to deliver, rather than cheat the value of joy in others by spiritual design.

Roy Michael Blakely is a nudist. He's also a divorced father of 5 grown sons & a daughter in Heaven. He is also a newly published author of "Gender Values: A Proposal for Marriage in a Bottle". Michael believes that as long as “normal” is used as a measure for right and wrong, insanity will rule us against growth-maturity-and love! Check out his blogs at Gentle Eyes and Gender Values. Follow Roy on Twitter @gendervalues.

Naked November is coming!

As Frankenstorm touches down in the Carolina's and New Jersey, we're hoping for safety for those affected. GetLusty readers, we'll do what we can to keep you stocked on resources to improve your relationship through the process at the least. We'll try to intersperse information for our West coast readers, but to be honest, you're likely hearing a lot about these updates anyway. Either way--we care and are really hoping things go as smoothly as possible for residents of those areas. (Luckily, we're in Chicago currently, but we'll get our share of snow soon, I'm sure). 

On to a brighter note. I cannot believe we're almost done with Orgasm October. We had so many fabulous articles that you--our readers--enjoyed. Within the next several days, we'll feature the best of. We certainly won't stop talking about orgasms, but we will be shifting gears slightly.

Can you believe Halloween is damn near over? November is coming! Oh, my. Fall. It's that time of year when you get cuddled up and nude? Wait, did I just say nude? Yes. We're talking about getting naked. That's right. If you haven't seen why we recommend nudity, you're missing out! We've talked about it before. Getting naked is highly enjoyable for many reasons.

It might seem counter-intuitive. You're going to be feasting, you'll be eating like crazy. Sure. But being naked--emotionally and physically--is just as important in November as in the summer.

Some of the things we'll address: why you should be naked sometimes (and not just in the shower). How feeling emotionally naked could improve your relationship (think: vulnerability). And, what are some naked date night ideas? We're not just talking about cranking your heat up in your living space,  we'll also talk about vulnerability and how you can be emotionally naked.

Because as we've heard before, when you're clear with your lover, and you're happy with yourself--that's far more likely to project onto your relationship. So go ahead--get naked! Even if it's just emotionally because you're cold.

Have article ideas? E-mail me directly erica@getlusty.com.

One more thing! Have 2 minutes to spare? Want to help end boring sex and enter to win a VulvaLoveLovely creation? 'Like' us on Facebook!

With love,
Erica Grigg & Tim Watson
Chief Lust Officers at GetLusty for Couples
 
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