Women's sexuality. It's one of those things that's near and dear to our hearts. At GetLusty, we're all some form feminists so we place a great importance on defining and empowering women's sexuality. We interviewed Jill Abrahams, the Executive Producer/Founder of CherryTV, to get her take on what led to her embracing her sexuality and beliefs.
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How did you get to starting CherryTV? Why did you start it? What's your story? I started CherryTV because the content that I desired wasn’t available. This blog post provides much of the information. This fact sheet attached was included in our press kit when we launched in 2008. And the featured video of our indiegogo campaign also gives great background!
Why is women's sexuality important to you?
I went for years thinking I was “broken.” I also didn’t enjoy sex and understand what the big deal was – and therefore felt inadequate in bed. And I felt alone … that I was the only one who felt this way. Upon learning that other women go through similar experiences – and beginning the journey in overcoming my hurdles … I wanted to help others. They say the most important things in life are having someone to love and to have work in which you feel inspired by. The notion that I could use my professional experience to help women feel more confident, comfortable and fulfilled in bed was a awesome.
Do you consider yourself a feminist?
Yes despite the fact that I’m not really sure what it means anymore. Do I believe men and women deserve equality in all accounts – yes. Do I believe American society oppresses women – yes!
If so/ if not, why? We live in a patriarchal society in which men make the rules. If men were the ones to get pregnant – abortion and birth control would be a non-issue. The “establishment” has kept women down – and whatever we can do to correct that is worthwhile.
In terms of sex -- I do believe men and women are different in the way they relate to each other on an intimate level. And while we all want to be cherished, loved and respected – the way in which the different sexes (and note, I’m not saying gender – because that’s really not within my area of expertise. CherryTV is basically a hetero-normative site for women) need their appreciate for the other expressed tend to be different based simply on biology.
If women would embrace our sexuality, what would that look like?
I think women would feel they have more of a voice in the bedroom – a right (and obligation) to tell their partner what they want and how they are feeling. I also believe women would no longer feel they need to “perform” in bed – be the sex partner they’re man wants – and as opposed to an equal part of the equation. I would like to believe women would also become more comfortable with their “womanly” bodies – and not feel obligated to fit in to the media-dictated ideal.
If we embraced our sexuality I also believe women would, in general, feel a greater sense of strength and agency in all their activities. We would exhibit, I like to think (and know from personal experience) an increased ownership over work and environment. For example – women have a harder time discussing salary during job interviews than men. What’s up with that? If we felt empowered sexually, I like to think it would “trickle down” into all our activities. I often think, and remind my girlfriends, “would a man handle it that way??”
Lastly, if we were able to increase our belief in the power of our sexuality Mae West would become a bigger icon than Marilyn Monroe. Marilyn represented the female ideal for men, Mae West on the other hand was in control; unabashedly a women in command of her sexuality.
If you had three tips for women to feel sexier, what would they be? Masturbate regularly – switch it up, if need be, between manual and vibrator; Realize media’s idealization of the perfect female body is unrealistic and most men love “having something to grab on to.” Embrace the fact that you can have great sex without being “sexy” in the way mainstream culture dictates.
Tell your partner exactly what you like and want – if it’s more kissing, touching, AND compliments… whatever. Sensuality is both physical and emotional – and knowing your partner desires you is a turn on that resonates throughout our being. Compliments, just like the increased closeness experienced from physical intimacy, effect our well being and sexual selves!
How do you use your own sexuality to live a better life?
As someone who is comfortable with her sexuality, I have found that my sense of “friskiness” (in the appropriate setting) rubs off on others. People are therefore more open and relaxed – and we all have a better time. I have also become the go-to for questions from girlfriends, and that feels good! What are you looking forward to over the next 6-12 months? Relaunching the CherryTV.com website (with support from our indiegogo compaign, creating new videos, and integrating partner content!
More about Jill:Jill Abrahams is the Executive Producer/Founder of CherryTV.com. She's worked on the internet and in television for more than 15 years. Prior to creating CherryTV.com, Jill produced content and developed strategies for web-based, interactive programming at media outlets such as Rainbow Media and the Russian Media Group.
In 1998, Jill expanded her production work at Pseudo as founder and executive producer of Cherrybomb.com, CherryTV.com’s predecessor. It was then that Jill first developed a firm commitment to helping women develop sexual confidence by producing programming that honestly reflects women’s sexual needs and interests. Prior to her work at Pseudo, Jill honed her video production skills during a four-year stint as a producer for the then-fledgling Food Network. Originally hired as a Production Assistant and the Network’s tenth employee, Jill learned first-hand what it takes to build a successful media outlet from the ground up.
Jill began her initial preparations for a career in media during college, earning a BA from the School of Journalism at the University of Wisconsin, Madison.
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