The 3 Most Awkward Snuggie Sex Positions

We've had a delay on our daily dose of sex positions, so to bounce back we're here with Snuggie sex. Yes, you heard right. Sex with Snuggies on.

You know? Those cuddly, soft and fuzzy bath-robe-type lounge wear? On the search for the finest sex positions, we found these. And we thought you should know. GetLusty's staff writer Milan Weasley is here to talk about sex positions.

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Whilst browsing sex positions, I came across Snuggie Sutra. The tongue-in-cheek quality of these descriptions are only matched by the hilarious figures. After reading a few, snickers are inevitable. But I wanted to take the challenge of adding my own spin onto some of these positions.

The Gobble Gobble

Tis' the holiday season. Thanksgiving is coming in just under 2 weeks. This holiday is all about sharing what you have and giving to others. After clearing off the dinner table, why not give to each other?

To add another layer of weirdness: gobble like your life depended on it. Between your moans and sighs of ecstasy, throw in a few deep and throaty gobbles.

As if this isn't good enough, throw a snuggie in the mix. It's even warmer and snnuglier. Oh, my! Though the awkward factor on this position is low, we're glad it is. Focus on the cunnilingus--or blowjob--here, folks!


The Banana Split

I have one word for this position: bananas. 

This position would take quite a bit of flexibility. But it looks pretty interesting. Take advantage of your kitchen, especially if you live in a smaller apartment. There's always interesting places to have sex.

To amp up the awkward: bring props. Nothing better than adding a cherry on top. Or a nice shower of roasted peanuts. Bonus points if you can distract your partner long enough to stick them into crevices.

On a side note: even more bonus points for doing the splits during sex. If you do, watch out. You'll likely need some help to get out of this position.

The Night In

Don't ya just love multitasking? You can have an orgasm while you finish up the last few chapters of The Hunger Games or maybe a book appropriate for adults, like the complete collection of English poet, painter and visionary William Blake. How far can you get before throwing down your book?

If it wasn't already odd enough: try reading out loud. Much like Hysterical Literature, after a while it gets pretty hard to hold your moans in. Make it a game. Read the most outlandish quotes you can find. First to laugh loses. And "losing means certain death. May the odds be ever in your favor."

Snuggie sex may be almost impossible to have without laughing. But it can be done. What's love without laughter anyway? And if you can't hold back the giggles, add some of my silly hints to make it that much goofier. Have you tried Snuggie sex? Would you try it now? Share with us below!

Milan Weasley is one of our first lesbian writers. (Ah! Dykes and dildos!) She spends her days procrastinating grad school and her nights procrastinating everything else. She enjoys writing, gogo dancing, sewing, pole dancing, and defending the Oxford comma. Get in touch with her at milan@getlusty.com.

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10 Craziest American Sex Laws

America is a strange and fantastic place. We are afforded some of the greatest luxuries the world has to offer, and supposedly are allowed to say and do anything we want. Actually, no.

When it comes to sex laws, we are not anywhere close to the land of the free. In fact, The United States has more laws governing sex acts than all of Europe combined. Luckily, GetLusty's Andrew Ewald is here to demystify and tell you about the wacky things that you might not want to tell the police about.

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#1 Only Missionary
Place: Washington, D.C.

Who would've thought that having more than 'vanilla' sex would be considered illegal? In Washington, D.C., the only acceptable sexual position is the missionary position. No, I guess we should consider here for a moment. Does this law apply to politicians? Because they fuck people in the ass all the time.

#2 No rodeo sex
Place: Massachusetts

If you're a little kinky and want to get fresh at a rodeo in MA, we recommend against it. In Massachusetts rodeos, it's illegal to have sex with a rodeo clown in the presence of horses. It's not talking about bestiality (which is very uncool because it involves un-consensual sex so we're very against it), rather just having sex in front of the animals. Is this law meant to protect the clowns or the horses?

#4 Excessive police niceness about car sex
Place: Coeur D'Alene, Idaho

We never thought we'd add police niceness to the list but here it goes. In Coeur D'Alene, Idaho, it's safe to make love while in a parked car.  Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. If an officer is suspicious, he must drive up from behind, honk three times, and wait two minutes before getting out to investigate. With regard to most of the other laws that either make no sense or are offensive, this one is crazy because of it's sensibility and politeness.

#3 No habitual kissing with mustaches
Place: Indiana

Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans. So seriously, where di this law come from, anyway? Does Indiana have an out-of-control mustache problem? Some sort of kissing phobia? Do they film a lot of porn there? How do you qualify and register as a habitual kisser of humans? Are there mustache check points at random intersections?

#5 No tollbooth sex
Place: Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

It is illegal to have sex with a truck driver in a tollbooth. Don't laugh. Truck driver tollbooth sex (TDTS) causes massive traffic back-ups and costs the freight industry millions of dollars in lost revenue each year. Unless the TDTS problem is addressed head-on, we stand to lose a great deal more than just shipping revenue. This legislation aims to correct this deplorable threat to our economy.

#6 No wedding hunting
Place: Oblong, Illinois

It is punishable by law to have sex while hunting or fishing on your wedding day. I feel like the primary reason this activity is only illegal because of its difficulty level. Just imagine the skill required to handle two different types of tackle, several guns and a wedding dress! Very few people are such talented outdoorsmen and lovers.

#7 No corsets
Place: Merryville, Montana

Wearing a corset is illegal because, in the law's own words, "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the red-blooded American male."

It must be noted that in Norfolk, Virginia there is law in place enforcing the use of corsets for which there was even a civil-service job, reserved for men only, called a "corset inspector". The Merryville law seems like a step in a more progressive direction even though it seems aimed at protecting men's rights.

#8 No gun play during orgasms
Place: Connersville, Wisconsin

It is against the law for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner has an orgasm. This is the sort of law that gives people ideas. Not everyone thinks about bringing a gun into bed and firing off a few victory rounds. But when you put it on paper like that, Connersville, it sounds pretty exciting.

#9 No oral sex
Place: Missouri

Missouri is supposed to be, "The welfare of the people shall be the supreme law". At least according to its state motto. Not so much says GetLusty. It is illegal to engage in oral sex in Missouri. Why? We're not sure as oral sex is one of our favorite ways to start of sex. But don't get caught doing this 'indecent' act otherwise you could be at risk of persecution.

#10 No dick costumes
Place: Nevada

It is illegal for any member of the legislature to conduct official business wearing a penis costume while the legislature is in session. We cannot have the general public thinking that politicians are giant, walking erections. That would give people the wrong idea about government.

Andrew Ewald is a GetLusty writer who spends most of his time reading, writing, cooking, and watching RuPaul's Drag Race with his girlfriend.

He graduated from Western Michigan University with a Bachelor's in in English. He might act like a square, but nothing is taboo with this character. Connect with him! E-mail him at andrew@getlusty.com.

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28 Surprising Benefits of Being a Loving Couple

Do you realize how wonderful it is to have a loving spouse? Being in an amazing sexual relationship is beautiful and can be very beneficial for your overall health and even finances. Even when things get difficult, being close to someone is one of the best things life has to offer. Of course we get bored and forget how lucky we are to be close to someone. That's OK! At GetLusty, we've put together a list of just some of the benefits of being part of an awesome couple.

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#1 Waking up next to each other. Loneliness might be the most despairing aspect of being single. Opening your eyes after a long nights sleep and seeing the beautiful face of the one you love is a wonderful thing.

#2 Always having someone to see a movie with. Not to say that convenience is a benefit, but if you've found the right one, then you have a best friend who is there to share all your cinematic adventures with.

#3 Seeing the smile on your partners face when you bring them breakfast in bed. From childhood we humans have this obsessive urge to please the ones we love. We behaved this way with our parents, aunts, and grandparents. Now that we're all grown up, we want to carry this convention forward with our relationships. It gives us a sense of accomplishment, and reminds us of how loved we are.

#4 Loving the sound of your partner's annoying laugh. Being ridiculously and insanely smitten with someone is one the most exciting occurrences one will ever experience. To be so infatuated that every little annoying habit becomes a spine-tingling, hair-raising event.

#5 Being able to test your robot dance out on a captive audience. Many of us have a hard time being ourselves out in public. Some of us even dread the idea of co-worker or family member seeing how we act at home, when we're all alone. When you have that special someone in your life, you have a person who loves every silly, bizarre thing you do, and you'll love performing for them.

#6 Having someone to hold onto while you watch "The Exorcist" for the fourth time. It's not just a benefit for the ladies. No matter what your man tells you, he gets scared too, and having someone there provides a huge sense of safety. Having someone who makes you feel safe carries over to larger issues in life - not just spooky movies.

#7 Taking showers together. With your partner there for every aspect of your life, those once ordinary day-to-day tasks suddenly become potential erotic adventures.

#8 Attending your favorite sporting event together. Many singles stubbornly think that sporting events are just for the guys, but a victory make-out session is much more exciting than a few high-fives with your pals. Another benefit is the amount of adrenalin that's built up during a game. Adrenalin always makes for great sex after the match.

#9 Knowing that you have someone to depend on. Your partner is more than just bed mate, they're your companion - someone to experience this life with. Life gets hard, and complicated, and can even seem unbearable at times. The great thing about a couple is, when you fall, there is always someone there to pick you up.

#10 Feeding each other chocolate covered strawberries. Everyone loves being pampered. Whether it's sharing fruit, or a massage. You'll always have someone there to spoil you.

#11 No more depressing masturbation! We know, there will always be masturbation, no matter how often you and your partner have sex. After discovering that intense connection we call love with someone, the sexual experience ascends to something greater than just satisfying that itch in your pants.

#12 Taking vacations together. The majority of us are not loners. Deep down in our core, we crave friendship and community. When it comes to traveling, most of us are intimidated by the thought of going at it alone, so having that loved one next to you seems to arouse the explorer in us.

#13 Perpetual encouragement. Even the best of us lose a little self-esteem from time to time. It's an amazing thing to always have someone there to help rebuild your fortitude.

#14 All-night Netflix marathons. One of the most adventurous things we did in our childhood was staying up all night with our best friends, watching movies and playing games. After we all grew up, that didn't seem to happen anymore. Your friends have lives of their own now and don't seem too excited about having a slumber party with you. Well, that's what your partner is for. He or she is your new best friend, and they'll always be there to help you build that fort in the living room.

#15 Your ass will always look great in that outfit. As we've noted before, confidence is a huge issue with us humans. We are constantly worried about how others see us, and we're even a little superficial at times. Your girlfriend or boyfriend always wants to be the hottest person you know, and you always will be, because you really are the hottest person in the world to them. 

#16 The glorious majesty of oral sex. Sure, you can get a blowjob during a one-night stand, but will it be the greatest blowjob you ever receive? Probably not. Having that one person, night after night, day after day, to explore and experiment with - that's how you master the art of oral sex. Cunnilingus takes some practice, and is a different experience with every woman. Nobody knows how to blow their woman's mind on the first try. It takes time. A couple has the benefit of discovering that perfect orgasm.

#17 Relaxing in the tub together. Everyone loves a bubble bath! Having someone's slippery, naked body rubbing against yours turns that tranquil time in the tub into a romantic, and erotic engagement.



#18 Holding hands (duh!). Intimacy is incredibly fulfilling, whether it's spooning in bed, or just walking down the street, hand-in-hand. Maybe we get it from childhood, the safety and comfort of having someone hold your hand while crossing the street or wandering through a busy public space. What ever the reason, we all love doing it. 

#19 Having a road-trip partner. Before you found the love of your life, you had to ask around to find a friend who would take a trip with you. Sometimes that can be hard. Sometimes nobody wants to be stuck in a car with you for several hours at a time. A couple never has this issue. You're already spending every day together, so it might as well be spent in a car. There's not much better than exploring the open road with someone who laughs at all your bad jokes. 

#20 Having someone to split a Twix with. We're not saying you should be in a relationship just so you don't waste food, but the sharing aspect is very important. You're sharing food, experiences, thoughts - everything you love, everything you hate. You can think of it as "becoming one" with each other, or you could also see it as one person becoming twice as awesome. 

#21 Experimental cooking. Single folks usually fall into their own routine, and they stick with it until someone comes along and introduces them to something new. For the stereotypical male, it's pizza, hot wings, and anything that's easy to cook. When you find yourself in a couple, you discover this urge to try new things. You've merged your lifestyle with someone else's, and that tends to shake things up a bit. You'll both want to find ways to change those old habits of yours.

#22 Getting texts during your work day that make you feel better. You're not alone in this world. The crappy day at work doesn't have to seed into your mind when you have someone on your team, routing for you. He or she isn't just the person you hook up with at home every night, they're personal pep rally. By the end of  your shift, if won't matter how much your boss yelled at you - not when you know you're in love, and are loved in return.

#23 Having someone who makes sure you don't get too drunk. Sometimes your judgement can waver a bit, and you might need a little assistance. It's nice to have someone looking out for you - someone you will thanking in the morning.

#24 Having someone who will listen to you complain about your parents. After a while you'll notice that some of your friends don't make the best listeners, and your siblings can be a little critical, especially if you're the younger one. A couple always has someone to hear their problems, without judgement.

#25 Negotiating foot massages and back rubs. Single people need to pay people for this kind of thing. Other than the financial benefit, it can be really fun bartering for things with loving displays of affection.

#26 Realizing that even when you fight, you still love each other. You'll notice that singles don't fight. They can always just walk away from an argument, but not couples. They love and care for one another. The argument is important.

#27  Getting to experiment with pubic hair lengths. OK, this sounds a little weird, and maybe even a little gross, but think about it. There are places on your body you would never allow a lover to explore. Be in a couple for a certain amount of time and see how absurdly comfortable you become around your partner. You'll start peeing in front of each other, picking your nose in front of them, and yes, playing with their pubic hair.

#28 Knowing how lucky you are. This might not sound like an extremely important benefit right away, but try to remember the last time you felt this way. Happy couples are so damn happy because of little things like this. You'll see them around sometimes, walking tall, a modest smile on their face.

Jason Estrada is currently working on his master's for creative writing, in the hopes of becoming a very rich screenwriter some day. His other interests include photography, cinematography, and video editing. His favorite book is The Great Gatsby. Favorite movie is either The Crow or When Harry Met Sally - can't decide. And his all time favorite show is Doctor Who.

When he's not enjoying any of those things, you can find him at home, drinking and smoking way too much while listening to VNV Nation. You can email him at jason@getlusty.com, or try his Facebook page.

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